Well I am guilty of doing what bugs you the last time I sent out request for links – why? Because I was interested in attracting high quality link partners so I sent out a cordial letter inquiring if they would be interested in exchanging links with sites x y z etc … only about 40% of the people replied the other 60% missed out on getting links on PR 6&7 sites .
At one time I agreed that if someone wanted to request a link they should have me up already, but I don’t think that’s necessary any more. I used to put links up and then request only to find that they never reply and I’m forced to go back and take links down.
Work on creating partnerships not just obtaining a link. To do this I believe you need to make contact in a more amiable manner – get to know the person first – don’t waste his/her or your own time.
What really bugs me is all these damn directories people are using!! Hell by the time you click through the 4-5 links to get to your category your on a PR 2 or 3 page! NO way in hell I’m going to give someone a link on a PR 5-7 for a 2 or 3 in return!