Believe in your fate, as cruel as it may seem, believe that everything that happened to you happened to make you stronger, and in turn u spread that strength to your brothers and sisters, even if your loss pains u, believe it was worth it
I don’t have all the answers, but find a way to draw strength from your pain, it happened for a reason, u may never find out or understand why, just believe there is a higher purpose, and take this with u into the next life
That’s the best i can tell u, i’ve buried my own blood a few times over the years, just remember, the dead who really loved u would never want u to suffer because of them, so stop tormenting yourself, there’s no reason for it
Try to put on a happy face, i know it’s hard but u gotta do it