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I forgot this one:
This is a test of the emergency pickup line service. Beeeeeeeeeep. If you had been any less beautiful, you would have just heard a bad pickup line.
Gregger;212098 wrote:(Seasonal) Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want for Christmas.That is brilliant.
I will use it in your honour Gregger.
CK – Schalk;212163 wrote:Does this smell like Chloroform to you? :inlove:Hahahhaha!
Go up to a lady, show them the second and third fingers on your hand and say..
“Do you know why women use these 2 fingers to orgasm with?”
‘Cos they’re mine’
Works every time. Guaranteed*
*this may not be true
PG version:
Want to go back to my place for a pizza and sex?
(If she says no)
What? you don’t like pizza?Around my parts we don’t call it being single, we call it the pursuit of happiness. Its in the Declaration of Independence after all.
This weekend I did hear a buddy of mine use this one… it did not work:
Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?
I once had a guy walk up to me and say “Nice shoes, wanna root?”
(here in Oz a “root” is a word for sex)Charming. I laughed in his face and walked away.
Another guys pickup line was telling me how crap our country was and that he hated it (mind you he came from a war ridden part of Croatia – go figure)…
They are the two only times I have ever had anyone try to hit on me..
Famous line from “The Wog Boy” (Aussie movie)
They say you are what you eat and by tomorrow morning I’d like to be you.Apparently that one works every time…
My two all-time favorites…
1. Approach your target and ask them: “What winks and screws like a tiger?”
Let them sit there for a moment, and during their pause of uncertainty, give them a big old wink!2. As your speaking with a lovely lady, continuously sit there and rub your face. When they ask what you are doing, tell them that you are clearing them a place to sit!
If and when your pick-up line fails use this good come-back line:
“I suppose a f**k is out of the question then?” :roflmao:On Halloween this year I had a girl walk up to me as I was wearing my lab coat (that made a few appearances on CAPtv). She said “so what are you supposed to be?”. I replied, “I guess a doctor or something” to which she replied “ooh a doctor!”. Everyone was happy.
If only pick up lines worked as well on girls as they did on guys.
I was eating lunch with my brother and he told the waitress that she was so fine he would drink her dirty bath water. Ewww
These are some the best;
Heres 10p to ring your mum to tell her your not coming home tonight darling. (This was b4 mobile phones)
Grab your coat, your pulled!
Ask her how she likes her egss in the monrning… wait for response, then u say fertlisesed!
ask her… did it hurt? she will say did what hurt? u reply when you fell from heaven.
ask her… Are you tired? coss you have been running through my mind all night. lol
ask her… is your dad a theif? she will say pardon or f**k off then you say, your dad stole the stars and put them in your eyes.
Theose are mega cheesy!
When i was traveling around aus and asia (many moons ago) me and my mates would play loads of games… here are some of them.. i still think they are timeless treasures
Go upto a girl, we like would do you know about laying floor tiles? Its just so random, and stupid… you then start doing your work. Or what do you know about changing alternators? allways a good ice breaker
Also a supid pick game is when out with mates (of course).. your not allowed to speak to a girl with out saying a stupid commment… some of the favorites would be..
Cor Blimey Girl, ive had some ugly birds but u take the biscuit. with this you would think its very rude… but when you do it to the most stunnning girl in the pub, its pretty funny (in our eyes anyway
We also played a game which lasted 2 weeks lol, when talking to any female, at the end of every sentace you had to say Ding or Ding Dong. So the way u decide if it was Ding or ding dong, would be if you root her or not lol i.e. hiya darling, hows it going ding dong? u just keep slipping it in. Or you go into a shop to buy smokes, errrmmm i would like 20 B&H please ding
lmao they were good and funny times
