Hi T:
I realized after re-reading your post i didn’t answer some questions. I will try to cover now.
kids are …. (*girls) …. 11, 13 (maybe 14 .. I don’t keep up …. I just buy or pay for presents….and I’m lucky to remember my own biological son’s age …. which I think is now 20) …. but anyway ….. boy’s age answered … the two older girls are now 18 …..(I keep calling her 17) ….. and I guess probably 19 or 20.
got a sister that’s about 20 ….. brother about 18 ….. (by another mother … dad .. remarried to a woman half his age …. not something I will ever do) ..
took a while to accept that …. not them …. that! hard to accept a woman that’s only 4 yrs older than you as a step-mom ….. dad is rich …. so you can understand my concerns. however she stayed with him 25 yrs …. and he’s a very hard man. In the end ….. now they’re split up …. it pisses dad off that I hug her … (step-mother) … and in fact accept her as i figure …. mom stayed 25 yrs before divorce …. because of the new woman .. but the new woman also stayed 25 yrs. It took a while but i realized she loved him for what he is …. and he’s a prick at times ……. never much more than grumpy though only now is mellowing. I understood the second wife’s leaving him for reasons I won’t go into much more than what’s been said.
anyway ….. add all that into now mom is remarried …. happily….. to a great guy i might add …. and dad has a new woman in his life.
sadly …..because i come from a family with money …. its not a situation where we have a Christmas situation where you buy for one person …. each one is expected to be bought for …. and ….. well lets put it this way ….. 30 people bought a present at $20 …. which is nothing …. costs $600. and that’s like buying chewing gum for each. you can’t really buy the kind of gifts you’d like at those prices ….. and needless to say ….. kids deserve much better gifts than those that cost $20. so Christmas for me is … beyond imagination except for those that are used to this and in that case … they likely are from families that don’t see expensive gifts from some ….. and not from others.
Its a very bad situation … and I know worse for my younger siblings as I know they too …. suffer from same financial situations as i do.
but being a father …. and someone suppose to be doing well. ….. its very stressful to make things work to both survive costs and show a gift to each person that reflects the love i feel.
that said…… I’m very lucky. I have so much to worry about. i know that. so i have no reason to complain.. just saying its stressful to try and find the right balance that these matters bring.
could be worse. I really feel sorry for those that have nobody ….. that don’t even have the stress of worry over such matters. So nobody feel sorry for me ….. rather give to those that face nothing. that have little family …… or perhaps none.
That is true Christmas giving. And I honestly ask that anybody that this post has touched ….. give to charity that might make a difference to a child that might otherwise go without or with little.